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A Road Guide For Mindful Living & Relating

Wednesday, March 01, 2023

Primary Blog/Coaching/A Road Guide For Mindful Living & Relating

A Road Guide For Mindful Living & Relating

Uh Oh…! It’s happened again!

Have you allowed yourself in some way be taken for granted, be unappreciated, uncelebrated, unsupported or unacknowledged?

Self-care, self-growth, development and the travel into the dark waters of the shadow don’t come with a guide map when we set out on this path in life. When you begin this journey and start seeing progress and miles traveled it can feel like you’ve really got the hang of it, and then out of no-where bam! The front wheel of the bicycle hit a gaping hole just because your eyes were adverted for just a quick second. Perhaps it even feels like the bike has flipped over and your world is upside down as you observe your feet flying over your head. Does it mean that other triumphs weren’t real? Or that you haven’t learned? No, in fact, this is wonderful news despite possible remaining road rash!

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Accidents happen along the road! When we see the bumps as opportunities vs obstacles we get so much more out of the ride.

By now you might disagree, maybe even have your hands on your hips and be expecting an explanation, so let’s break it down. Yes, there may be bruises, scrapes, and other discomforts from bumps on the road. We are human after all, and no amount of soul work, healing, or raising our consciousness makes anyone exempt in our time here. It’s normal to have ups and downs, and merry go rounds, a bit of a relief to acknowledge, isn’t it? Afterall, if every bike ride was smooth, ‘perfect’, or went otherwise as expected where would our learning opportunities come from?! There’s value in every obstacle! What I’m talking about here is changing up your gear, what if your biking goggles aren’t made for this specific trip and are a bigger distraction from the road? We can make the switch! Change the gear and get perspective, wisdom, and awareness moving forward. Changes the whole path, doesn’t it?

The old headgear can make it easy to cast blame, make another wrong, judge, sling mud or otherwise react in a way that only takes you off course and further away from your goals and desired destination.

When we change the headgear somethings become clearer, we can now identify the flowers from the invasive weeds! We can choose which we want to water, put love into vs simply appreciate it’s inherent value and opt to walk away. Instead, we may even begin to appreciate the benefits of the new rearview mirrors on the bike that allow you the perspective of your very own steering. Yes, that’s right! We do steer ourselves on life’s bicycle paths after all (I say rearview because one of the best ways to predict our own tendencies in steering may come from how we’ve steered in the past if we’ve done so unconsciously)! What an amazing concept, we can think about how and why we perhaps unconsciously hit that pothole and expected a different result, we can even plan on how to brace ourselves for the next or better yet avoid them all together, what empowerment!

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When you understand you are steering you then choose where will you take yourself!

The road rash, bruises, bumps, and scrapes serve to get our attention, it’s your soul calling and hoping you pick up the line this time for a greater conversation about love! By seeing how you’ve steered, thinking about why you chose pants that are too tight and keep you from really moving, that’s where the treasures are!

So what does one do in this position? Changing the headgear helps, although it doesn’t solve everything, we definitely start here. In the context of coaching and hypnosis, this looks like identifying mental thinking filters, making mindful observations and choices! It’s like taking the steering wheel with that firmer understanding when you know that in the past you may have catastrophized something, thought the journey thus far was all or nothing because it wasn’t perfect. A good coach can aid you to find limiting beliefs, and then make new ones that lead to more mindful choices and thus more satisfying results.

A mindful being knows what they will need for the journey, even the possible bumps or bird poop!

A Few Tips For The Road!

  • Set Yourself Up For Success: Think a little ahead about what you want, truly deeply want and get intentional! Which path will lead you there? Is it the path with the wildflowers, or the one that’s a bit more work but a breathtaking view at the end? If you know you may have allergies, and that you go mountainside that bird poop happens you get to be better prepared. Don’t forget to pack that first aid kit, goggles that protect your eyes instead of hiding the full view, and a cleanup kit. If you’re working with a coach, hypnosis practitioner it’s like packing your bags for the trip, you can choose motivation for when you feel your resolve starting to slip, you can gain support and have some accountability or a second pair of eyes when mapping out the road you most wish to travel.
  • Find A Tour-Guide or Map: You could continue the same old way, blame, lash out, feel victimized by the rock that’s blocked your tire from moving but it really doesn’t help in the long run or prepare for the future. So Ask for help! Reach out, maybe find a bike tour guide fit for the trip and communicate. Even if they’re ascended and can speak about the view at the top of that hill you’ve been trying to climb they still need to hear your goals, possible pitfalls, fears, and ideas to decide how best to show up for you. IF you know you have that reaction to pollen tell your guide, they will know that when the fork in the road comes to go left rather than through the dandelion fields. Yes, that means trusting, it means being honest, open, vulnerable even assertive! BUT that’s how you truly allow your loved ones to show up for you. That’s how you let others know what you’re expecting in the relationships and what you need so that you don’t get left out in the cold when the rain starts to fall and everyone else packed cold weather gear. For many, this is a scary step but allow me to reassure you its benefits outweigh the cons every time!
  • Acceptance vs Rose Colored Goggles: Accepting what is instead of allowing false perception to steer you back to the house in defeat. Acknowledging the tree on the path isn’t the whole forest is important, especially to keep moving forward. This is a big part of being selective of your gear. Did you pack the right tools? They say that seeing is believing, so if you chose those mud stained goggles best be aware of what you are choosing to believe. Accepting doesn’t mean you have to like it, it just means you are willing to give yourself choices. Seeing the log on the path means choosing to jump it with certain risks or dismounting and walking the bike around. Remember at the end of it all you are steering!
  • Listen To Your Heart: a
  • ​Learn:  a
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Happy trails and success to you!

Happy travels! And who knows maybe you will be leading others through this same exploration next couple of times around, but just as I do trust that you can make the trip!

If you find you would like some guidance, a map, or to get clearer on your gear don’t be scared to ask for some help! Send me a message and let’s talk about it!

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Hi, I Am Amanda M Dodd

CEO Of Healing Beyond Trauma
Transpersonal Clinical Hypnotherapy & Coaching

Here's where I can let you into my world a bit more, some of my musings, inspirations, discoveries, events, and what I'm up to!

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