Have you allowed yourself in some way be taken for granted, be unappreciated, uncelebrated, unsupported or unacknowledged?

Self-care, self-growth, development and the travel into the dark waters of the shadow don’t come with a guide map when we set out on this path in life. When you begin this journey and start seeing progress and miles traveled it can feel like you’ve really got the hang of it, and then out of no-where bam! The front wheel of the bicycle hit a gaping hole just because your eyes were adverted for just a quick second. Perhaps it even feels like the bike has flipped over and your world is upside down as you observe your feet flying over your head. Does it mean that other triumphs weren’t real? Or that you haven’t learned? No, in fact, this is wonderful news despite possible remaining road rash!

By now you might disagree, maybe even have your hands on your hips and be expecting an explanation, so let’s break it down. Yes, there may be bruises, scrapes, and other discomforts from bumps on the road. We are human after all, and no amount of soul work, healing, or raising our consciousness makes anyone exempt in our time here. It’s normal to have ups and downs, and merry go rounds, a bit of a relief to acknowledge, isn’t it? Afterall, if every bike ride was smooth, ‘perfect’, or went otherwise as expected where would our learning opportunities come from?! There’s value in every obstacle! What I’m talking about here is changing up your gear, what if your biking goggles aren’t made for this specific trip and are a bigger distraction from the road? We can make the switch! Change the gear and get perspective, wisdom, and awareness moving forward. Changes the whole path, doesn’t it?

The old headgear can make it easy to cast blame, make another wrong, judge, sling mud or otherwise react in a way that only takes you off course and further away from your goals and desired destination.

When we change the headgear somethings become clearer, we can now identify the flowers from the invasive weeds! We can choose which we want to water, put love into vs simply appreciate it’s inherent value and opt to walk away. Instead, we may even begin to appreciate the benefits of the new rearview mirrors on the bike that allow you the perspective of your very own steering. Yes, that’s right! We do steer ourselves on life’s bicycle paths after all (I say rearview because one of the best ways to predict our own tendencies in steering may come from how we’ve steered in the past if we’ve done so unconsciously)! What an amazing concept, we can think about how and why we perhaps unconsciously hit that pothole and expected a different result, we can even plan on how to brace ourselves for the next or better yet avoid them all together, what empowerment!

The road rash, bruises, bumps, and scrapes serve to get our attention, it’s your soul calling and hoping you pick up the line this time for a greater conversation about love! By seeing how you’ve steered, thinking about why you chose pants that are too tight and keep you from really moving, that’s where the treasures are!


So what does one do in this position? Changing the headgear helps, although it doesn’t solve everything, we definitely start here. In the context of coaching and hypnosis, this looks like identifying mental thinking filters, making mindful observations and choices! It’s like taking the steering wheel with that firmer understanding when you know that in the past you may have catastrophized something, thought the journey thus far was all or nothing because it wasn’t perfect. A good coach can aid you to find limiting beliefs, and then make new ones that lead to more mindful choices and thus more satisfying results.

A Few Tips For The Road!