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Leaving a faith tradition can be about far more than changing what you believe.

For some women, especially those raised within highly structured or high-control religious environments, faith can become intertwined with identity, family, motherhood, morality, community, and an entire understanding of how life is supposed to work.

So what happens when those beliefs no longer resonate?

In this episode of Soulreign, Amanda M Dodd speaks with Audra Phelps, NLP Practitioner and Coach, about the complicated and deeply personal process of rebuilding identity after leaving the LDS Church—and how the lessons apply to women navigating faith transitions and major shifts in identity more broadly.

Audra founded Mama Audra to support women, particularly mothers, who are navigating the grief, uncertainty, guilt, loneliness, and identity loss that can accompany a faith crisis or departure from a high-control organization.

Her message is simple but powerful:

You are not alone. Your emotions are valid. And you are worthy of love and support while you figure out what comes next.

When Leaving Changes More Than Your Beliefs

A faith transition can involve questioning beliefs that have shaped nearly every aspect of a person's life.

For Audra, leaving the LDS Church wasn't simply about changing her religious beliefs. It meant confronting questions about who she was, how she wanted to parent, what relationships meant, and what values she genuinely wanted to carry forward.

That process can create a profound sense of uncertainty.

When the framework that once provided answers disappears, there can be an unexpected period of asking:

Who am I now?
What do I actually believe?
Which values are mine?
Which beliefs were inherited?
What does being a good mother mean to me?
How do I make decisions without the certainty I once had?

Those questions can be liberating—but they can also be painful.

The Grief of a Faith Transition

One of the most important themes in Audra's work is recognizing that faith transitions can involve real grief.

People may grieve a community, friendships, traditions, certainty, family expectations, or the future they once imagined for themselves.

For mothers, that grief can become particularly complicated when they worry about how their choices affect their children.

Audra speaks to the experience of feeling like you're failing your children while simultaneously trying to figure out who you are.

That combination of grief, guilt, uncertainty, and identity reconstruction deserves compassion rather than judgment.

Rebuilding Identity After Leaving

Audra's own journey eventually became one of discovering which beliefs actually resonated with her rather than automatically accepting the beliefs she had inherited.

That distinction can be transformative.

Instead of asking, "What am I supposed to believe?", the question becomes:

"What do I believe—and why?"

Identity reconstruction isn't necessarily about throwing everything away. It's about becoming intentional.

Some beliefs may remain. Others may change. New values may emerge. And some parts of the former identity may simply no longer fit.

The process creates an opportunity to build a life based on chosen values rather than inherited expectations.

Motherhood Without the Old Rulebook

For women who were taught very specific expectations around motherhood, a faith transition can also force a reevaluation of parenting.

What does it mean to raise children when you are no longer operating from the framework you were given?

Audra describes learning to build relationships with her children based more on love, trust, curiosity, and connection.

That doesn't mean parenting suddenly becomes easy.

It means the relationship can become less about fulfilling an external definition of what a "good mother" should be and more about developing an authentic relationship with the individual children in front of you.

Finding Community Without Judgment

Another critical part of transition is finding people who understand the experience.

Audra emphasizes the importance of reaching out to people who can respond with curiosity rather than judgment.

Sometimes what a person needs most isn't another person telling them what to believe.

They need someone who can say:

"I understand. You're not the only one going through this."

Community can make the difference between experiencing a transition as profound isolation and experiencing it as the beginning of a new chapter.

You Don't Have to Have It All Figured Out

One of the most reassuring messages from this conversation is that identity doesn't have to be reconstructed overnight.

Transitions take time.

There can be uncertainty, experimentation, grief, discovery, and even moments of returning to questions you thought you had already answered.

That's not failure.

It's part of becoming more intentional about the life you're creating.

And perhaps most importantly, you don't have to wait until you have everything figured out before you deserve support.

About Audra Phelps

Audra Phelps is an NLP Practitioner and Coach and the founder of Mama Audra, where she supports women navigating faith transitions, identity shifts, motherhood, grief, and the uncertainty that can accompany major life changes.

With more than 15 years of experience in international education and coaching, Audra began her career as a high school biology teacher before working with international schools overseas.

After leaving the LDS Church herself, she experienced firsthand the loneliness, uncertainty, grief, and identity loss that can accompany a major faith transition. That experience ultimately led her toward coaching women through the process of discovering who they are beyond the beliefs and expectations they once carried.

Her work is particularly focused on women leaving the LDS Church, while her coaching is open to women navigating faith transitions after leaving high-control organizations more broadly.
Sponsored By

This podcast is brought to you by Healing Beyond Trauma — Hypnotherapy & Trauma-Informed Coaching. Each episode is made possible through work dedicated to nervous system regulation, subconscious integration, and soul-aligned healing.
​www.HealingBeyondTrauma.com